Friday, November 12, 2010

"I didn't notice the signs, you covered both of my eyes."


That title pretty much sums up my entire history with relationships. I seem to get lost in them. I seem to not see what's right in front of me. Of course it's easy to blame the other person and say they deceived me, and I'm positive that I HAVE been deceived before, but it's important for me to take responsibility as well.

Lately I've been trying to figure out why I'm so angry all the time. I haven't been in a real relationship in two years (and dont want to be in one now) but have I gotten too used to doing things myself? Have I become so jaded that something as simple as a compliment seems insincere to me? I dont feel like I'm holding onto any residual resentment but am I? Who do you talk to in order to get answers to these questions? lol.

I just know that I'm starting to go down a not-so-good emotional path. I've been coming home and sleeping and I've been feeling more stressed/emotional than normal lately. I just want to figure out whatever it is that's bothering me and deal with it so I can move on with life. lol.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Why I'm done hating Nicki Minaj...


So first, a brief history... when I first heard Nicki Minaj, it was some mixtape song called "Beef Stew". I thought it was cute. Nothing too sophisticated about it. Heard a few more songs of hers and wasn't too impressed. It was all very nursery school rhyming to me. The more I heard from her, the more I hated her. I kept WAITING and WAITING for a female vet (Foxy, Rah Digga, Eve...hell, even Krumbery Bones) to drop something to rock her simple, nursery school rhyming ass out of the water...and it never happened. lol. That bum bitch Keys tried to come for her in the Itty Bitty Piggy remake but once she dropped her own material, it was pretty clear that Keys would never be a contender.

Anyway, then she did the BET Cypher and KILLED it! I was back in her corner, expecting more stuff like that from her. Then she dropped "Massive Attack" and "Your Love" which made me hate her again. More stupid, elementary rap garbage. Then she did "Monster" and "Check It Out" which made me like her once more. Then the other day, "Romans Revenge" with Eminem leaked and upon liking it, I realized something. All the bitching and moaning that people (including me) have been doing about her is pretty irrelevant. She's the ONLY female in the rap game right now really doing anything. Sure, Rah Digga dropped an album last month that went triple gum wrapper (despite it being a pretty dope cd. Yes, I copped it.) but other females, at this point, have had MANY an oppurtunity to steal the spotlight back and yet, haven't. Foxy is busy holding down the fort at Popeye's, Eve is off being Hollywood somewhere and Krumberly is just...praying to stay half relevant (I have never liked her so you won't find me saying anything nice about her...ever).

and speaking of Krumberly Bones...what a joke. She made all that noise about Nicki not paying homage, talked shit in all kinds of interviews, even did some promo tour (for what?) and never bothered to drop a single, hop on a remix or anything. So my ENTIRE point is this. If you dont like Nicki Minaj, that's fine. But at least respect her hustle. No other female has bothered to try and steal her shine so just let her have her moment.

and yes, I'm still keeping my fingers crossed for Foxy to put down the two piece and Remy to make early parole.